Driven by Madness
by Kabub
Summary: It is about thirty years after the Millennium war which did not just shake England, but the entire world. London has been rebuilt on top of its former ruins and is a beacon of light for the old, new and foreign worlds.
1. Reminiscence

"Advance Troop B find cover!" was the last thing the commander ordered his team through the walkie-talkies before a huge canon shell flew past them. It collided with a concrete wall about fifty feet away from the small group of soldiers. The shell exploded instantly on contact, and burned everything to crisps instantly with a huge heat shock wave.

"Well, that took care of those nasty ghouls! Haven't seen those pumpkin heads around in a while." exclaimed a short haired blond woman while quickly holstering her over-sized canon behind her back. She jumped down from the elevated post with no effort and landed on the now with ashes and debris covered ground, just in time before the structure crumbled behind her. The air was thick with dark smoke, and the visibility was low with random flickers of fire popping up. In a distance one could hear the crumbling noises of more fallen objects. Flames flickered and danced around her, but it was to no bother to the woman.

"Commander Bridges to Seras Victoria! The entire advance troop has been taken out by your Harkonnen. That is short of a dozen trained men dead. Don't you think you could have used your enhanced abilities to deal with this situation differently?" was shouted into her ear through the headset by the commander. Bridges was new to Hellsing, and to Seras' opinion did not quite know his place yet.

She turned on her mic and calmly replied: "Commander, I probably could have. However, the main target is about to get away. Your people are in my way to silence the main objective, which I'll be getting to now. That troop of soldiers was outnumbered anyway and would probably have been dead within another ten minutes. If anything, I made this quick for them."

"What are you talking about? Whatever mutation we are dealing with, they were slow and seem to have no higher thought process. Troop B might have been outnumbered, but could have easily taken them down!" replied the commander, snapping quickly back at her.

"I really wish we'd still educate people on vampires, and other supernatural creatures and don't just explain everything with mutations and cybernetic enhancements…" Seras thought to herself as she debated on a reply to this snotty guy.

After the Millennium war the entire world was in a deep state of chaos, mainly because the common population could simply not handle the idea of not being on the top of the food chain. Interestingly, everything was hushed down quickly by international authorities with rumors of terrorists, lab experiments and super soldiers created by Neo Nazis. How people believed that was beyond Seras, but it worked. Unfortunately for her, she could not just explain that to Bridges, or anyone in fact. Normally it would not have mattered anyway because vampire attacks were extremely rare and most of the time Hellsing's forces were sent out to deal with underground or government experiments gone south, making her un-life incredibly boring. However, this was different. It reminded her back to the days when she was newly turned, and stood by her master's side. She missed being called Police Girl and being afraid of the dark.

"Seras Victoria! Are you even listening?!" shouted the commander at her. She was abruptly ripped out of her thoughts, apparently missing some dialogue directed at her by Bridges.

"Commander, no I'm not. I don't know if you have been given this information, but this is a new advanced threat not to be underestimated! I'll be dealing with my target now." She instantly roared back at him and started running through the destroyed room in a slightly faster pace than humanly possible. She could not dematerialize, create her shadow wings or travel through a portal; technology had not caught up to her vampire standards yet. Pretending to be technologically advanced made living with humans plausible but also dulled her excitement down extremely. However, tonight the old fashioned hunt was on and she was almost giddy about it.

The target in question was not really getting away like she had stated to Bridges. It was hard to believe that he was not a fledgling vampire; his powers were not developed and it seemed like his senses were not either. Or maybe his master was toying around, but Seras could not sense any current ties to older blood. For Seras this was game, and whilst her prey was trying to make an escape, he left an easy to follow presence, which she could easily pick up with her Third Eye.

Interestingly enough, the escaping vampire chose a deserted road to run along. Seras found an abandoned house and jumped up on the roof to see the scene unfold. This all seemed too familiar. The full moon was hanging low in the sky, no clouds obstructing its eerie illuminating shine. There was a tree line on both sides of the road, full of mighty oaks and old pines and the occasional shrub. The wind softly rustled through their crowns, making them move in unison like a soft ripple in the water. It was just like when…

"Your turn, Police Girl" Alucard said to Seras. How she could hear him so clearly while he was still inside the house made no sense to her. Nothing made sense to her right now. She was trembling and replied nervously: "Yes, sir."

"What are you waiting for? Do it!" the elder vampire commanded. The targeted female vampire was running for her un-life, and Seras was quickly losing faith in her "new" abilities. She knew what these two freaks had done. She knew her mission and felt this strong sense of duty, but right now anxiety caught up to her.

"Sir, she is already, five… no, six hundred meters away!" is all she could reply back to her master, Alucard. This was impossible, and she feared for what was to come next.

However, unlike during her police training when her superiors instantly yelled and judged her, the girl's master calmly replied in a soothing voice: "Imagine the Third Eye. On the forehead, aim from there. If you shoot like a human, then you're going to miss like a human."

"But sir…"

"Aim right for her heart. Don't worry. You'll put the bullet right through her." He kept on going, reassuring Seras.

She was getting more nervous and was starting to shake. She had no equipment to deal with this, and never had previous training for these sort of missions. She simply did not understand how killing vampires was now expected of her. She did not even feel like she was a supernatural nocturnal being. All she could say back was: "But it's so dark, and I don't have a scope."

Somehow she felt Alucard's presence closer now. He sounded a little firmer now, but not overwhelmingly.

"That's a human complaint. Now, it's time to make the shot like a proper vampire!"

Something in her changed when he mentioned the word vampire. The fledgling felt a little bit out of control as her new powers came surging through her. She concentrated on the target, aimed and killed…

Him.

Seras was a little bit in shock as she realized what just happened. Lost in thought she pulled the trigger and entirely through instinct, without any given thought, killed the escaping vampire. His chest was torn open by the immense bullet, and there was only a wide gaping hole where his heart used to be. His body collapsed on the deserted road, blood pooling around the corpse. As his last bits of consciousness left this world, his remains turned into a small pile of dust. A soft wind rushed over the street, picked up the pile, and carried it with it until nothing was left of the now truly dead vampire.

That was not how it was supposed to go. The female Nosferatu was hoping for an intense chase, playing with her prey and letting go of all her control and powers, although it was not even close to necessary with her enemy having that low of abilities. The last time she got out of Hellsing mansion on a mission was years ago, and only after the threat had killed an entire squad of Hellsing soldiers, due to miscalculations about the situation by superiors. Back then, she put a quick end to it, feeling sick to her stomach that so many human lives had been lost to pride and stupidity.

Only now, did she realize that it had not bothered her that she single-mindedly killed about a dozen people. Relatively innocent men and women that had no idea what was coming for them. The indication of becoming more and more inhuman did bother her though. Thirty years ago, she clung to her humanity with every cell of her being. Even after drinking Pip's blood, and coming into her full abilities, duty and responsibility always kept Seras on her toes. However that seemed so far away now, like her still absent and missing master, like the Wild Geese teasing and annoying her, like anyone truly recognizing and caring for her.


	2. Familarity

"Oh ma Chère, those are some troublesome thoughts in your head. You know that I would love to cheer you up anytime!" Pip teased to Seras in his thick French accent as soon as she arrived back at the Hellsing mansion.

"Pip, I'd rather not have you taunt me in my own head right now or ever!" she replied to the annoying French guy in her head. Pip Bernadotte has been her familiar ever since that dreadful night Zorin Blitz attacked the Hellsing compound during the Millennium war. After the battles of that night were over, the duo cleaned up London the following weeks for remaining ghouls or vampires. When that was done, they decided with Sir Integra's approval that he should guard the mansion from any further threats.

His shadows enveloped everything, and Pip knew about every little detail happening in the mansion and on the compound's grounds. And did he ever enjoy it! He loved peeking into the soldiers' barracks or the staff that had to live full time at the complex. There were thousands of people on the grounds every day and sometimes he would play a trick or two on them as well.

In the last few years though, Seras shut him more and more out. He did not know if it was the familiar to master bond, or his unfaltering love to the petite blond woman, but he really longed for her voice and compassion. Pip knew that Seras was facing a mid-un-life crisis or even something closer to depression, vampire or not.

He tried to reach out to her again: "Seras, ma Cherie, you don't have to hide from me. You can even talk tête-à-tête to the old mademoiselle Hellsing. But I'd prefer if you talked to me, and then maybe after we can…"

"Pip, I am not hiding from anyone! Whatever you think I need to talk about, I assure you there is nothing to worry about! And now, you can get your dirty French mouth out of here!" Seras snapped at him mid-sentence. Unfortunately to Pip, this was an order and he had to do as she wished. He truly worried about her, but he had no idea how to approach the woman he cared for properly. Her mood swings at him were frequent now, and he knew that if nothing changed or she did not open up to someone soon, her demonic side would completely swallow the sweet girl he once knew.

* * *

A few days had passed since the vampire attack. Commander Bridges handed in his report to his superiors, and through the isosceles shape of command made it to Sir Integra Hellsing's desk.

The older woman held one of her rich cigars in one hand, its sweet scent filling the air around her. Her office had been rebuilt to its former fashion, an immense wooden desk the focus of the room. It had documents all over it and she seemed not able to catch up on her duties. Her organization had gone through many reformations and reconstructions in the last thirty years, however, it seemed that not even a handful of well-trained people were capable of handling all of her responsibilities. The stress and her age were catching up to woman in charge, and she felt more often tired and exhausted.

It was later in the evening by now, her blazer hung lazily over the office chair, the first two buttons of her blouse were open. As she was reading through the report, she did not know what to make of it. She called for Seras on this mission to ensure the disaster of a few years passed would not repeat itself. It was still immensely difficult to find people wanting to fight for King and country, and it was yet another task to keep them alive. Honestly, she did not expect any casualties, she knew of Seras' powers. However, she could not dismiss the feeling that her vampire subordinate was becoming more distant and this report was proof for it. She saw no other way, she had to confront the only other "living" being that she entirely trusted.

"You called for me, Sir Integra?" a sweet voice echoed through the office as Seras' shadows materialized in the room and took the shape of the nocturnal being's curvy form. When Integra looked at the female vampire, she let out a long sigh. As any "immortal" being, Seras' appearance did not change a bit as Integra grew older and older. She still wore her beige Hellsing uniform that clung too tightly to her body and should have been tailored a size or two bigger. Integra never understood what Walter and Alucard were thinking when they originally made the new vampire wear that excuse of a uniform. The vampire's face, of course, had not changed either. No wrinkles, no sunspots, nor other signs of aging. Seras' appearance, unintentionally, exposed all of Integra's, in her opinion, shallow and vain weaknesses. The head of Hellsing hated how old and frail she looked now.

Integra took a long inhale from her cigar and exhaled slowly. She felt a slow headache coming.

"Yes, I did Seras. We need to talk about the mission I sent you out with a few days ago. Mind explaining why you saw it fit to rip a Harkonnen shell past my men to eliminate a few ghouls only then to cleanly kill the main vampire without even getting your uniform dirty?" The one in charge asked, more demanded, from her subordinate. She unintentionally raised her voice at the being across from her, a trait she still had not managed to control. Whilst most of her new employees would have cringed at such a direct command, Integra knew she did not have to beat around the stick with Seras. They had been through enough the last three decades.

Two brilliant blue eyes starred into one blue eye, ignoring the black patch that adorned Sir Hellsing's face ever since the fight with the Major. Seras had to gulp, as even she realized, that the situation put like that, left not much for her to say that would help her cause.

One could feel the power shift as Seras was leaning to give in to the older woman, only for the vampire to realize that she did not have to. She respected Integra immensely and would never harm her, and whilst at work the head of Hellsing was her boss, both of them had worked to a relationship that was of equal parts, closer to friendship. The petite blonde exhaled slowly and let her confidence built up; her side of the story was just as valid the that Bridges guy's.

"Yes Sir Integra, I can." Seras stated matter-of-factually.

"The troop sent out was built of about a dozen men and women, very well trained for any mission but ghoul extermination. Although they had been given more than enough information, as soon as they saw their enemy, they underestimated their target and started slacking. I understand that I could have assisted them, however that would have shown more of my abilities and taken my time. I did not think that option would have been beneficial to the situation seeing as my target was making an escape. Sadly, I overestimated the vampire and while in a... sort of trance... I shot him without too much thought given."

All of it was very calmly reported, much to Sir Integra's surprise. Both of them, however, noticed that little hick-up in the last sentence, and it spiked the old woman's curiosity.

"Seras, what sort of trance are you talking about? Are you unwell?" she inquired concerned.

"Sir, may I talk freely?" Seras replied a little sheepish. This was a touchy subject, but she already knew that the person in front of her had caught up to it.

"You should know you needn't ask for permission on that." The older woman stated, and inhaled another time on her cigar. The tension and power struggle in the room had past, and made room for a calming and nurturing atmosphere.

"Something about the situation reminded me about the first time I was sent out with Master to take care of that vampire couple. I remembered the first lesson given about the Third Eye, and then somehow just made the shot while still in thought. I really had hoped to get more action out of the night, but this snuck up on me off guard". Seras just let it out, there was no reason to bottle this situation and make something else out of it.

Whenever Alucard or Walter were mentioned, it made Integra's heart cringe. It had been so long, but even time cannot heal some wounds. And now, as she looked into Seras' eyes, she could see the hurt and loneliness there, too.

"Thank you for telling me the truth, Seras. Just understand that next time, you must come up with a better solution than this. There are no restrictions on your abilities, so I know what you're capable of. I'm sure the soldiers will accept another fabricated lie about you if that would have saved their comrades' lives." Integra spoke softly to Seras.

Ever so shortly, silence fell in between them.

"Are you still sure Alucard will be coming back?" Integra hesitantly asked. Even mentioning his name did not come easy. It was that uncertainty about him that made it hard to accept she might never see him again. It was a silly notion, but the head of Hellsing really missed her servant, the centuries old No-Life King.

"I'm sure of it!" Seras replied brightly, without a moment's time. It was like the air changed instantly, all the doubts and worries gone.

"If Master was completely gone, I'm sure I or any undead creature wouldn't be around. I have to admit though, he is taking his time!" she continued on cheerily. Even Seras did not know where that sheer enthusiasm came from, but she welcomed it needingly.

"Thank you Seras, you may leave now. I'll be getting ready to retire for the night." Integra replied calmly, a burden lifted from her heart, if even only for a night.

* * *

It was later at night now, and Seras was absentmindedly wandering through the Hellsing dungeons. The dark had been her home for many decades now, and she enjoyed every aspect of it. The thick stone walls were cold and damp to the touch. To a human, it would have been completely silent, but she picked up many different sounds. In a distance, condensation water was slowly dripping of a ragged edge in a rock. Although it seemed dead, the entire area was alive. Bugs, centipedes and other creepy crawlers were leaving a their melodic tapping echoing through the halls. Some bats were flying around, their supersonic waves rhythmically bouncing of the walls. Even if she could not physically see the moon, she felt its presence through her entire being, soothing out any discomfort. To most, this was the stuff out of horror scenes. To her, this was an eerie, but ambient composition.

Something compelled her to visit her master's chamber. It was not the first time she had visited, but she only found herself coming here in times most desperate. She was a little surprised when she realized where she had materialized to. The young vampire knew that today had not really been that emotionally wrecked as it normally requires to be for her to pay visit to the unchanged room. Alucard's coffin laid here absently, its inscription gone completely. Normally it said "The bird of Hermes is my name, eating my wings to make me tame", but now it only held the last physical remnant of her master: the stone cube which held engraved Alucard's seal and symbol.

Seras knelt next to the coffin and stroked it gently.

"I always wondered what that was supposed to even mean, Master, it makes completely no sense. Your name was never Hermes, and I don't believe it even fits as a metaphor since you never gave yourself willingly into servitude. Without Van Hellsing, who knew what would have happened... well, whatever that would have been, it probably would have not included me.." She mumbled and trailed off, completely lost in what she was even saying.

All of the sudden there it was. A familiar sensation she never remembered having experienced before. Her blood was running and burning through her body, pulsating on her neck where her bite mark is. Her entire body was screaming, like something had torn open her chest and ripped out her heart. She lost orientation, and with that any idea of time and space. The moment seemed to last forever and at the same time, it passed by her only within seconds. Somehow she felt his presence, and just as quickly as everything fell apart, it was gone, and the whirlwind of chaos over.

Seras looked up, and shakily spoke up into the empty room.

"Master?"

* * *

So, I guess I put notes down here? I have been on the site for forever, but never actually posted anything.

This Was Hard. And it's only the second chapter.

What I have in mind is going to cripple me for decades to come. And sorry about anyone seeing this formatted weirdly. I have internet connection problems in 2016! O.o


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